Singing, silly and forced to surrender

I'm not exactly sure where all the energy comes from but it certainly comes in abundance.
It should be something we can bottle to access for ourselves when needed. Sadly it does not work this way.
This day was a particularly difficult day, but having this video to look back on makes it seems humorous at least. At the time, I felt both a deep love as well as a loss of control as I was forced to surrender in the chaos. Yes, it is true, I had no control over anything this day and no choice but to give into it. Or loose my mind. Which I did as well, I think, what? I had already lost it?



It's been a rough month and I am worn out. Challenged in many ways through out my life, children, home, health, work, you name it... Today I put the kids to bed for nap, walked across the hall to my bed and collapsed. I just don't do that. Today there was no choice. Truth be told, I laid down and just cried feeling defeated by the weight of everything. And then I slept dreaming of the same chaos, but sleeping just the same. I awoke to Carl calling to me... when I went in he smiled and said, "I love you Momma." It is hearing his and Willow's words, "I love you so, so much Momma" that make it all bearable and give me the strength I need to get through the rough patches. Oh they know how to push my buttons, but they also know how to warm my heart!